Fireflies in the Garden

Lovely movie if you have not watched it. A lot of drama. But loved it, as it feels a bit that way right now.

It feels like things are not going as it should be but it will in the end.
It feels like frustration and anger but it should be replaced with patience and calm.
It feels like moaning and depression but replaced with smiles and laughter instead.

After all where can the prior get you, if you don’t keep thinking with positivity in mind.
So here I am in that phase of life, and I’m trying my best to stay positive whatever the outcome will be. I try to count my blessings as people say I should. I try to make life as fun as can be though so many thoughts are running at the back of my mind knowing that things are not as they seem to be. It’s tough but it needs to be done. I find God gives you that extra boost of strength at times like this. I’m sure it doesn’t come from me. It’s so much tougher when I’ve been feeling this way for a long long time.

My husband’s recent outstation trip, he got me these lovely really nice leather bounded journals. They look amazing. As you’d have probably observed I’ve not been blogging much. That is because I have my current journal which is still not finished.

I started my first journal as a tribute to me about to turn 30 and it has been since. Now I’m thinking when I should start my second journal, was wondering probably it would be a tribute if I do get pregnant again. A place to document my whole pregnancy when that happens. You can tell I’m really psyching myself into this positivity behaviour.

I do thank God however for all the relationships that I have in this life. Family and friends who have made this whole experience so much easier to bear with. It is still the most important thing in my life – relationships.